Hello, everyone... it's me, Erin Joy.
I know I've been absent for a while... but I've been told occasionally that a doll like me is very much missed, so I thought I'd start posting again. :)
I just got back from a wonderful tour with the Women's Concert Choir. We spent most of it in the Virginias and Carolinas, enjoying fellowship, music, sight seeing... and LOTS of chocolate! Our "signature" candy is the M&M... you'd be surprised at how many of those a doll like me can eat. (Maybe that's where I got that extra cotton...)
One of the things I've appreciated most about WCC is the spiritual focus the group has. In addition to prayer time each week with a small group, we have weekly devotions. This semester, we've been going through the book Hinds' Feet on High Places. On tour, parts of Hinds' Feet were able to come to life as we looked out over the mountains of North Carolina from the famous Chimney Rock.
God used Hinds' Feet, Chimney Rock, and a host of other experiences over the past few weeks to cause me to realize a very important lesson. Once again, He asked me to surrender. I've had a list of "worst case scenarios" that could happen, and had subconsciously decided that if God asked me to do one of these things I would be very unwilling. God started showing me this lack of surrender before we left on tour, and then it all began to culminate at Chimney Rock.
As I looked out over the gorgeous mountains, I realized anew how majestic and huge my God is. When you compare God to a tiny doll like me... I'm pretty small. I know He is loving and good... but He deserves to be followed because He is God, not just because He has my best interests at heart.
The chapter from Hinds' Feet we had just read echoed this same lesson. In the chapter, the Shepherd asked Much-Afraid what she would do if everything appeared that He had deceived her. "My Lord," she said, "if you can deceive me, you may. It can make no difference. I must love you as long as I continue to exist. I cannot live without loving you."
God's majesty and character drove me that day to a new kind of surrender: a surrender not based on what God might call me to do, but a surrender based on who God is. Because, like Much-Afraid, I had to realize that no matter what He asks, it makes no difference. I must love Him and follow Him, because that's what He deserves.
With love from an absolute doll,